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Reviews and commentary by Tony Isabella
"America's Most Beloved Comic-Book Writer & Columnist"
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TONY'S ONLINE TIPS
for Monday, August 15, 2005
I'm opening today's TOT with Dan Piraro's BIZARRO panel from July 5 because it's just so darn funny. I thought about running a photo of a large dead alligator that looks like George Bush to me, but then I'd get a couple of *those* e-mails. I considered leading off with an installment of TONY'S CENTENNIAL COVERS, but I couldn't believe that the next title in line had made it to a hundred issues and then some. I think my mind just blotted out that awful truth. So...you get this BIZARRO panel and, if I have room, I'll share the centennial cover later in this column. As for that alligator, who, by the way, was from Texas, you're on your own.
Let's head for the reviews.
******
DC: SACRIFICE
HONKING BIG SPOILERS AHEAD
Please take the above warning seriously. I'll be describing and commenting on specific events in the comics I'm reviewing here. Warning, warning, warning.
THE OMAC PROJECT is a six-issue mini-series which has already had nine issues published with at least two issues to come. Maybe more. There are several other DC comics with "OMAC Project Tie-In" festooned on their covers and, as I have not read those, I have no way of knowing if they are actually important to the overall story, if they are simply crass commercial ploys, or if they are DC's new millennium equivalent of the "red skies" tie-ins which surrounded the 1980s CRISIS ON INFINITE EARTHS.
The one-shot COUNTDOWN TO INFINITE CRISIS is the actual first issue of THE OMAC PROJECT and, at the end of TOP #3, readers were directed to four other DC titles that would carry the story through to TOP #4. You decide if this six-and-then-some-issue mini-series is marketing brilliance, callous prevarication, or just bad math. Anything's possible.
TOT readers who are enjoying THE OMAC PROJECT keep asking me to review each new issue. They are so eager for me to hurt them I sometimes feel like I should be whacking them with a riding crop as I tell them how awful this series is. And, despite the remarkable talents involved, ye gods, is it awful!
"Sacrifice" runs through SUPERMAN #219, ACTION COMICS #829, ADVENTURES OF SUPERMAN #642, and WONDER WOMAN #219 [$2.50 each] and they are all pretty much the same damn comic, right down to their mostly ugly covers looking alike. The J.G. Jones cover for WONDER WOMAN is the best of the bunch.
At the end of THE OMAC PROJECT #3, we learned that Max Lord, previously a joke in the DC Universe, could control minds and had, indeed, taken control of Superman's mind. We also learned Lord was aware that Batman was on Lord's trail.
If you haven't been reading THE OMAC PROJECT - and, boy, do I envy you - fear not. I'll be sharing a succinct recap with you in a few more paragraphs.
THE OMAC PROJECT #3 leads into three issues of a mind-messed Superman watching his loved ones die in sadistically brutal fashion and exacting extremely brutal vengeance on the villains (Brainiac, Doomsday, Ruin) who killed them. Except that his loved ones didn't really die and, in each scenario, he's actually beating up on...oh, the suspense, which plays out until the end of the third chapter of "Sacrifice"...the Batman.
Gosh! I certainly didn't see that coming.
Three nearly identical comic books.
Three of comicdom's best writers.
Remarkable talents churning out three brutal and frankly dumb comic books that represent the modern-day super-hero genre at its absolute worst.
I won't give any of them even a single Tony.
I will give WONDER WOMAN #219 one Tony for the Amazon Princess recapping the story to date on its very first page:
"BATMAN created a SUPERCOMPUTER to SPY on his FRIENDS and ENEMIES alike. He called it the BROTHER MK I. Someone STOLE it from him.
"Ted Kord - the BLUE BEETLE - stumbled upon EVIDENCE of the THEFT, and in so doing, uncovered a broader CONSPIRACY. He was MURDERED before he could SHARE what he LEARNED.
"And FOUR hours ago, Superman tried to MURDER Batman. I STOPPED him BARELY.
"ALL of these events are the WORK of THIS man. This is MAX LORD. He can PUSH minds to do his BIDDING."
Gee, that wasn't hard at all. If only other comic books made as much effort to let readers new and old what the heck was going on in them, especially in the middle of six-issue mini-series with a growth imbalance.
This one has Superman and Wonder Woman duking it out. It has a fairly ridiculous scene where Superman knocks Wonder Woman from orbit and through an interstate with no loss of life. It has that criminal genius Max Lord repeating over and over again that he can control Superman's mind as long as he - criminal genius Max Lord - lives. So Wonder Woman kills him.
I'm not usually in favor of capital punishment, but some folks might just be too dumb to live.
Seriously, the only truly surprising thing about Wonder Woman snapping Lord's neck like a chicken bone is that it made me wonder what DC planned for the remaining three-or-more issues of THE OMAC PROJECT. But it wasn't a "Wow! I can't wait to see what happens!" kind of wonderment. It was a "Hmm...how are they going to fill the next three-or-more issues?" kind of wonderment.
Not that a reader would necessarily know that there were more issues to come outside of WONDER WOMAN. The last page of the issue has no copy directing the reader to THE OMAC PROJECT #4. I suppose even marketing has to sleep sometime.
In THE OMAC PROJECT #4 [$2.50], Lord's death triggers a final protocol. Brother MK I activates his OMAC troopers and they start killing everyone in Lord's headquarters and trying to kill super-heroes elsewhere in the world. By issue's end, it's not looking at all good for Sasha Bordeaux - Batman's agent and lover - or Rocket Red Seven. I suspect the remaining two-or-more issues of the mini-series will see more killings by the OMACs, possibly including some of the more minor DC heroes, before these Sentinel wannabe spawn of criminal genius Max Lord are defeated.
I don't think I have a Tony for this issue either.
Yes, I am in a snarky mood today and so was less diplomatic in reviewing these books than I could've been. But it pains me to see writers and artists this good making comics this bad.
The whole INFINITE CRISIS mishigosh screams "storytelling by committee." Indeed, I wouldn't be surprised to learn some of these writers had little or even no hand in planning the DC Universe-wide event. There is a sense of disconnect in the writing, something we have seen in previous DC and Marvel events. And I've yet to read one of them that has actually improved their respective universes, though, admittedly, most of them have been good for sales-spikes of extremely limited durations.
I still hope for the best. Believe it or not, I'd be pleased to reach the end of THE OMAC PROJECT or the coming INFINITE CRISIS, slap my forehead, and go "That was amazing!"
I'll keep you posted on that.
******
EVENTS OBSERVATIONS
Comics readers are having a great time debating the relative merits of DC's INFINITE CRISIS and Marvel's HOUSE OF M. How can I resist contributing my bit to the discussion?
DC's IDENTITY/INFINITE CRISIS is about super-heroes making bad and even immoral choices and, ultimately, being punished for their lapses of ethics and judgment. Putting aside my own doubts and/or dismay as to whether the heroes would have made these choices, I'm still left with a fundamentally dark DC Universe and not one which inspires a great deal of hope.
Marvel's AVENGERS DISASSEMBLED and HOUSE OF M seem to be more about terrible things happening to the super-heroes and the world around them, things not of their making, and, flawed though some of the heroes might be, their courageous and selfless attempts to set things rights. I disliked the AVENGERS event, but, looking at the overall picture, I find more common ground with the current Marvel heroes than I do with the current DC heroes.
DC doesn't seem to want us to trust their heroes; Marvel does. I see a larger divide between the philosophies of the two universes than at any time since Marvel's Stan Lee, Jack Kirby, Steve Ditko, and others changed the super-hero genre for the better.
This doesn't mean DC's approach negates the possibilities of great stories. If I were to again write Black Lightning for DC, I would operate in their universe, making use of even the feel-free-to-insert-your-own-negative-adjective things which have been done to and with my characters. Yeah, you'd eventually see a more moral and heroic Black Lightning emerge from my stories, but I'd use the darkness as my starting point. The last thing comics readers need or deserve is more shortsighted writers and editors mucking about with perfectly good characters or continuities. What it does mean is that, at the moment, if I were still writing for the Big Two, I would probably be a better fit at Marvel.
That's my contribution to the discussion.
What's yours?
******
ODDS AND ENDS
Looks like JUGHEAD writer Craig Boldman is giving us a little COMICS IN THE COMICS fun in JUGHEAD #170, which will be shipping on December 7. Here's what the Archie Comics solicitation materials have to say about one of that issue's stories...
"The Yeller Kid": After an excited yell inspired by a pizza commercial, Jughead finds himself literally speechless. Along comes Dilton with a yellow nightshirt that transmits the wearer's thoughts to the front of the shirt...just like a certain historical comic strip figure!
The story is drawn by the regular JUGHEAD team of Rex Lindsay and Rich Koslowski.
I also have some artist identifications for you, starting with the one story from SINISTER TALES #129 - see last Friday's column - for which I didn't have a credit. "Humans...Keep Out!" was drawn by my old Marvel Bullpen buddy, George Roussos. My thanks to noted comics historians Dr. Michael J. Vassallo, Tom Lammers, and Greg Gatlin for providing information for these columns - always assume any mistakes are mine - and for constantly adding more information to the general store of comicdom knowledge.
An earlier TOT [July 29] looked at Charlton's REPTISAURUS #4 from 1962. I didn't identify the artists of that issue because a) I said unkind things about their art there, and b) because I wasn't completely confident of my identification. Well, thanks to Michael Ambrose, publisher of the sensational CHARLTON SPOTLIGHT magazine, I can confirm my original (albeit unpublished) determination that the issue was pencilled by and inked by Vince Colletta. At the same time, though, let me stress that Charlton's rates were extremely low and Colletta wasn't the sort to give any company more than he thought they were paying for. Sinnott, one of my favorite comics artists since I first saw his art in TREASURE CHEST back in elementary school, was working for Colletta on these Charlton jobs and not the company itself.
Michael sent me a checklist of the - hold on to your hats now - over 2,600 pages Sinnott pencilled for Charlton from 1959 through 1963. The list was sent to Mike by Joe himself and contained job numbers, page counts, and story titles.
Sinnott's son Mark found some of the comic books in which the stories had appeared, so Joe sent Mike a follow-up list with that additional information.
The most exciting discovery for me was that Joe had pencilled several issues of GORGO and REPTISAURUS. You kids know how much I love even cheesy giant monsters.
According to Joe's records, he drew GORGO #5-11. Each of the stories would have been 20 pages in length. However, it should be noted that #11 is clearly drawn by Steve Ditko and that what seems to be Joe's final Gorgo job - "Monster Rendezvous - actually ran in the following issue.
Besides REPTISAURUS #4, Joe also pencilled two other stories of that winged creature: "Reptisaurus and the People's Dragon" and "Reptisaurus Vs. the Kremlin." I haven't been able to track down the issue numbers for those stories yet.
Thanks to Michael, the Sinnotts, Ramon Schenk, and Jim Amash for their roles in making this information available to me. Three cheers and tigers to each of you!
For a look at CHARLTON SPOTLIGHT - a magazine that has earned my recommendation every time out - go to:
www.ramonschenk.nl/charltoncomics/charltonspotlight
Now comes the fun of trying to score those Sinnott GORGO and REPTISAURUS before the rest of you. I should really learn to write about these comics *after* I get my copies.
******
TONY'S CENTENNIAL COVERS
ALPHA FLIGHT #100 [September, 1991] had a cover by Tom Morgan and was edited by Bobbie Chase. Inside the issue, readers got "The Final Option, Part Four: Decisions of Trust" by writer-guy Fabian Nicieza, penciller Mike Bair, and inker Chris Ivy. The issue had appearances by Her, Nova ala Frankie Raye, the Avengers, Galactus, and the Black Widow.
The 1990s were sometimes a rough go for me, which is probably why I don't remember that ALPHA FLIGHT made it to a hundred issues. Once I closed my comic-book shop in the fall of 1989, I never again kept a close eye on every title being published by Marvel or DC or anyone else. What I find even more astounding is that ALPHA FLIGHT ran 30 more issues before its cancellation in 1994, that a second ALPHA FLIGHT series ran 20 issues from 1997-1999, and that a short-lived third series was published recently. I figure it's only a matter of time before IT! THE LIVING COLOSSUS! gets his second shot at comics stardom.
If you think I'm mocking Canada's super-team, well, you might have a case there. Chalk it up to jealousy.
Canadians got an entire team of super-heroes.
Italians got...the Punisher.
It's just not fair.
Look for more of TONY'S CENTENNIAL COVERS in future editions of this column.
******
TONY POLLS REMINDER
Today is your last full day to vote on our current TONY POLLS question:
Which of these new TV dramas or genre shows for the new fall season are you most looking forward to seeing?
There were 19 choices and, if you haven't already done so, you can cast your ballot at:
www.worldfamouscomics.com/tony/poll
Sometime Tuesday, I'll be posting new TONY POLLS questions for your voting entertainment.
That's all for now. Thanks for spending part of your day with me. I'll be back tomorrow with more stuff.
Tony Isabella
<< 08/12/2005 | 08/15/2005 | 08/16/2005 >>
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THE "TONY" SCALE
ZERO: Burn your money before buying any comic receiving this rating. It doesn't *necessarily* mean there's absolutely nothing of value here - though it *could* - but whatever value it might possess shrinks into insignificance before its overall awfulness.
ONE: Buy something else. Maybe I found something which wasn't completely dreadful in the item, but not enough for me to recommend it when there are better comics available. I only want what's best for you, my children.
TWO: Basic judgment call. I found some value, but not enough to recommend it. My review should give you enough info to decide if you want to take a chance on it. Are you feeling lucky today, punk? Well, are you?
THREE: This denotes something I find perfectly respectable. There are better books out there, but I wouldn't regret buying this item. Based on my review, you should be able to determine if it's of interest to you. Let the Force guide you.
FOUR: I recommend anything earning this rating. Unless you don't like the genre, subject matter, or past work of the creators, I believe you'll enjoy this item. Isn't it uncanny how I can look right into your soul that way?
FIVE: Anything getting this rating is among the best comicdom has to offer. You should buy/read this, even if the genre/subject matter doesn't appeal to you. It's for your own good. Me, I live for comics and books this good...but not in a pathetic "Comic-Book Guy" sort of way.
Please send material you would like me to review to:
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