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Reviews and commentary by Tony Isabella
"America's Most Beloved Comic-Book Writer & Columnist"
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TONY'S ONLINE TIPS
for Wednesday, June 4, 2008
You wouldn't like me when I'm angry.
With today's placeholder column, the Incredible Hulk joins my friends Godzilla and Lassie as your tipoff that yours truly has not written a new edification or entertainment for you today. This is starting to look like the government's color-coded terror threats chart. Here's what we have so far:
When you see Lassie and read the phrase "What's that, Lassie? Tony's in the well?", then your friendly neighborhood Tipster has encountered some sort of suitable-for-the-family-hour difficulties that prevented me from writing a column.
When you see Godzilla and read the phrase "It's big and it's terrible!", then you know whatever difficulties your Tipster faces are somewhat larger in scope.
However, the appearance of the Hulk accompanied by the phrase "You wouldn't like me when I'm angry!" signifies that your Tipster is so incredibly ticked off about something, everything, or even nothing in particular that I couldn't write a column worthy of my beloved readers. This time around, it's mostly the last and it appears to be an annoying and occasional side effect of the daily medications I must take to keep from exploding into a sad red mist. Science marches on.
Not to worry. Once I recognize what's happening - and I have gotten very good at that - I can usually talk myself down in a few hours. Because even I don't like myself when I'm angry.
Thanks for spending a part of your day with me. I'll be back tomorrow with more stuff.
Tony Isabella
<< 06/03/2008 | 06/04/2008 | 06/05/2008 >>
Discuss this column with me at my Message Board. Also, read Heroes and Villains: Real and Imagined.
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THE "TONY" SCALE
ZERO: Burn your money before buying any comic receiving this rating. It doesn't *necessarily* mean there's absolutely nothing of value here - though it *could* - but whatever value it might possess shrinks into insignificance before its overall awfulness.
ONE: Buy something else. Maybe I found something which wasn't completely dreadful in the item, but not enough for me to recommend it when there are better comics available. I only want what's best for you, my children.
TWO: Basic judgment call. I found some value, but not enough to recommend it. My review should give you enough info to decide if you want to take a chance on it. Are you feeling lucky today, punk? Well, are you?
THREE: This denotes something I find perfectly respectable. There are better books out there, but I wouldn't regret buying this item. Based on my review, you should be able to determine if it's of interest to you. Let the Force guide you.
FOUR: I recommend anything earning this rating. Unless you don't like the genre, subject matter, or past work of the creators, I believe you'll enjoy this item. Isn't it uncanny how I can look right into your soul that way?
FIVE: Anything getting this rating is among the best comicdom has to offer. You should buy/read this, even if the genre/subject matter doesn't appeal to you. It's for your own good. Me, I live for comics and books this good...but not in a pathetic "Comic-Book Guy" sort of way.
Please send material you would like me to review to:
Tony's Online Tips
840 Damon Drive
Medina, OH 44256
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